The Happiness Paradox, Explained in 7 Minutes
There are only two kinds of people who do not experience painful emotions. The first kind are the psychopaths. The second kind are dead. There is a false understanding or expectation that a happy life means being happy all the time. No. Learning to accept and even embrace painful emotions is an important part of a happy life.
—–Tal Ben-Shahar, The Happiness Paradox
Why the pursuit of happiness leads to misery — and what to do about it
A growing body of research shows that the pursuit of happiness actually makes us miserable.
This paradoxical finding likely results from people setting impossibly high standards, excessively monitoring their happiness, and misunderstanding what will make them truly happy.
Positive psychologist Tal Ben-Shahar says that to be happier, we must find ways to pursue it indirectly while also accepting painful emotions.
Sisyphus, skateboarders, and the value in endless failure
Skateboarders regularly fail at their chosen activity. But that doesn’t make it a meaningless task of Sisyphean proportions
In the US talk show Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee (2012-19), the host Jerry Seinfeld remarks in a conversation with Chris Rock that ‘Those skateboard kids … are going to be all right.’ Rock expresses his agreement with Seinfeld, and they quickly move on to other topics. Their discussion about the value of skateboarding is quite brief (lasting about 20 seconds). But they agree that skateboarding provides skaters with a means of learning a life lesson. The lesson follows from the success of the skater in executing a manoeuvre after repeatedly failing (and falling). While some may nod their heads in agreement, it is worth considering whether Rock and Seinfeld are right. Does skateboarding teach a life lesson? If it does, is it a valuable lesson? Going further, why should we think that skateboarding is not, in fact, a meaningless activity that lacks any value?
These ‘Bad’ Personality Traits Can Be Good, Actually
Messiness
Selfishness
Ego
Shyness
Prone to Distraction
Cynicism
Neuroticism
Thin Skin
Pessimism
The myth of self-control
Psychologists say using willpower to achieve goals is overhyped. Here’s what actually works.
Bill Chance 